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Pussy Talk: Lessons From Making Pussy Too Cheap

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“He’ll come to understand, that the pussy ain’t free (nah),
Got that quality control, good pussy ain’t cheap (QC).”

City Girls

I was once a stupid hoe. Just fucking just to feel good. Just to get some sort of comfort from a man. Just to have the company of a man, I would give them pussy for nothing in return. I would give them head. I would come anytime they asked, and try my best to please them. Sometimes I thought something more would come from it, other times I was just having fun. However, one thing that remains true is that I asked for nothing in return. Without realizing it, I made men the prize. I thought it was my job to serve them. That serving them would get me what I ultimately wanted, needed: LOVE. Boy, I was wrong.

I know I got the idea of serving a man from church. It’s mostly what they teach to women: That if we want a husband she must serve him. What they also teach is that a man has to provide for the wife, and that when the man finds the wife he ultimately finds a good thing. SHE’S THE PRIZE. Damn, I missed that lesson. So while I was out here fucking any man I wanted to, I didn’t ask for a date, a bill paid, flowers, gifts, vacation, nothing. Just got some dick that didn’t even give me orgasms. I feel as dumb as Tara and Amina when Cardi B went in on Peter. “You get pussy out of both of them. And what are they getting in return? They look STUPID on T.V,” she said. The only thing I didn’t get was babies, and that’s a good thing. However, what I got was worse.

Because I made my pussy so cheap, I was in turn treated like I was cheap, of no value. My affairs never progressed into relationships. Some of these affairs were filled with abuse, and drama that it made me bitter towards men. Men would get what they want from me, and discard me like I was trash. Many moved on to the next woman and got married. Treated her the way I deserved to be treated. Gave her what I wanted. What was the difference between her and I? While, I don’t know their buisness, I’m sure she wasn’t giving up pussy for cheap. Here I thought I was doing the honorable thing by “loving a man for who he is” and being a woman “who asked for nothing and received everything”, and it just ultimately left me a bitter bitch. Was it a fair trade for cheap pussy?

To be fair, there were times I was also a confused hoe. At times what I wanted constantly changed. One minute i wanted a husband, and the next I just wanted to have fun. But the constant always remained: I wanted to be treated of value. Like a woman. Like a Lady. I wanted not only to be desired, but treasured. A damn shame I didn’t know my worth. And maybe that’s why I didn’t always give my best to a man. Outside of a few, MOST I didn’t see as the husband I wanted anyway. Some were already married, truth be told. However, I look back on those experiences and think that I completely wasted my time. Especially with the one that I had to most recently get out of my energy. But one thing I must own: They didn’t see my value, because I made myself cheap. My pussy. My time. My energy. My love. My services. I have to be accountable for that mistake.

Lessons Learned:

© Tanisha R. Coleman, 2021. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Tanisha R. Coleman with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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