Sistahs, are you dating with a purpose?
Are you procreating for a purpose?
Is your dating life driven from direction or circumstance?
I’m noticing that black men’s dating standards are the same no matter the type of relationship they seek: “WIFE MATERIAL”. If he just want to fuck, she gotta be “wifey material”. If he just want to chill sometimes, he expect wife benefits like full course meals, convenient sex, and a place to sleep. If he just want a friend to text sometimes, she got to met the standards of a wife just in case he comes around and decides to play husband. Meanwhile sisters are breaking their necks to prove to every man they meet that’s shes “qualified”, while he drags his feet and puts her on his time schedule.
Its time for sisters to raise their standards. Black men will say that most black women are single because she isn’t “wifey material” and many aren’t even looking for wives most of the time. There is more to dating than trying to prove to men you are worth being married to, because I see you many sisters neglect their own needs in this process. One thing I notice with men is if they say they “ONLY” want sex that’s what they mean. If they want to chill, more than likely they want sex and to chill before hand. If they only want a “friend”, they want sex and good conversations. Often times I see men tell sisters what they want is something non-committing and these sisters run back to their home girls, already planning their future wedding. Stop that shit.
If you are a woman whose ready for commitment, don’t even waste your time with a man who doesn’t say exactly that and SHOWS IT WITH CONSISTENT ACTIONS. Often women over indulge themselves to every man that makes her feel special at a given moment. Once they leave the initial stage of Euphoria, they realize they are in too deep and become comfortable (situation-ship). And god forbid if she becomes pregnant. Sisters need to start dating with a purpose, and be more forthcoming with their wants from men. Open communication is important and extremely vital that can prevent deception, misunderstandings, arguments, and heartbreaks.
Lay it out clear for him, stand your ground, and keep your word. If you are just wanting him for sex, don’t be doing extra shit. After y’all done sexing, kick his ass out. If you wait until the morning after, don’t let him lay up with you all damn day, making him breakfast and shit. His services are no longer needed. If you just want to chill, then CHILL. After that movie is over, start yawning. Its time for bed and time for him to go. If you go against your word, he will see right through you. You’ve been lying to him and yourself. You’ve been exposed.
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